Beware: Radical Thanksgiving Idea (It Could Change Everything)

Vannoy and Ross

Thanksgiving is almost here. This U.S. holiday provides an opportunity to pause and give thanks for the abundance in your life.

As most people know, operating in a state of gratitude is a powerful tool that moves you forward. And, focusing on what you have (such as what’s working, where you have momentum, etc.) significantly increases the chances that you’ll deliver more of the same – because you go toward your focus.

But is it possible too many people are cheating themselves? What happens if “giving thanks” for only the obvious blessings in your life…means you’re only doing the easy part – and denying yourself untapped momentum and energy?

Here’s a radical Thanksgiving idea: This year give thanks to those people and events that are currently making your life difficult. This is not a joke. And, it’s not for the faint of heart; superior living and leading often is the result of being willing and able to do what most others can’t or won’t.

Those gifted leaders reading this know that challenges (also known as problems, issues, etc.) are temporary locks on future growth – and it’s your job to break the code so you can move forward. Consider the possibility that the most important step in breaking the code to going to a new level of living and leading is giving thanks for what’s not working in your life.

Yes, this is a radical idea. (Is it really?)

But if it is true that if you want to change things, you have to change how you do things - then such an unusual twist to your Thanksgiving could change everything moving forward - not because it will immediately change the people and events around you; rather, it will change how you feel about everything “wrong” in your life.

Here’s to feeling different this Thanksgiving – and creating greater results moving forward.

Create Greater Confidence, Momentum and Focus – Right Now

Vannoy and Ross

My five-year-old daughter recently announced, “I know how to spell my friend’s name. We call him RJ.”

“How do you spell that, honey?”

With a big smile she lifted her chin and said, “R – J.”

You have to admire that sort of mastery. And we did! With cheers we celebrated her achievement. And do you know what happened next? She spent the rest of the day attempting to spell nearly every word she encountered.

Which provides us with an important reminder: Somewhere along the way most people begin expecting success – and therefore, they quit celebrating the wins. Thus, quite subtly, confidence begins to wane. Momentum begins to erode. And focus shifts more consistently to what’s not working, which ultimately results in one thing: fewer wins.

What would it be worth to you if, right now – today – you could build more confidence, forward momentum and stronger focus around you?

If this appeals, we challenge you to conduct the following experiment. Today, conduct three separate celebrations:

1. Identify one area where you are excelling. What is something you’ve been doing well lately, especially under trying circumstances? Give yourself some credit – and celebrate in your own way.
2. What is something the team around you is doing well? Shock your teammates and enhance the next meeting by pointing out something about the team that amazes or excites you. And then ask others what they believe is contributing to the successes that are evident.
3. Perhaps most importantly, on your drive home, identify one important quality you’re going to highlight with your family tonight – and then enjoy the difference this focus makes.

Life will throw my daughter tougher words to spell than R-J, but her strategy for success should never change.

 

What’s in Your Tool Belt…That Will Move Your Team Forward?

A leader once told us: “Before the Pathways to Leadership process, the only leadership tools I had in my belt for working with others was a hammer and a screwdriver.” This resonates with many people – and recently a man named Charlie added, “You missed the third tool a lot of leaders have in their leadership tool belt.”

What is that?

“Duct tape. With all the re-structuring, leaders need tape to keep teams together.”

We laughed – and the point was made: When it comes to ensuring teams are aligned and operating with trust, most organizations use “wish management.” A few teams get to play on ropes, and thus feel inspired for a couple of weeks; but painfully, not many teams acquire tools they can use to ensure a fusion, a strength of bond, that grows tighter each business day.

What tools are you using today to ensure your team becomes stronger as it works? Your competition may just be applying a screwdriver and “screwing” things up by focusing on all the ways the team is not performing well. Consequently, this inappropriate use of focus only ensures the team has its weaknesses reinforced and its confidence diminished.

By studying your failures you become an expert at failure – not success. Accordingly, this approach means the team will require duct tape in the days ahead.

The 3 Mind Factors (page 139 in Stomp the Elephant in the Office) is a powerful tool many readers know that, appropriately applied, can have a profound effect at ensuring teams perform at higher levels. The Mind Factors are: 1) You can only focus on one thought at a time. 2) You can’t avoid a ‘don’t.’ And 3) You go toward your focus.

Apply this tool today with your team by focusing on and acknowledging where your team is doing well, where it is performing with excellence. And, as proven by thousands of teams around the world, you will guarantee that your team improves even more in those areas.

What’s in your tool belt?

Halloween is Over, Right? Beware the Lingering Leadership Ghosts

In the U.S., Halloween has come and gone. The masks and witch brooms are back in storage. Fright-night is over, right?

 

Not so fast. There are ghosts still floating wild and haunting teams across the land. Does your business require a ghost buster?

Spend casual time with the average employee…and listen closely…and you may just hear ghost stories. These chilling tales take various forms:

• In some companies, make a mistake, and you’re a villain forever. Like demon spirit, your reputation floats far in front of you and lingers after you’ve left the room. You could have the potential to be the most effective leader in the land…but people will never know it. Your ghost lives on, and your company pays the price: How ironic: We want people to improve, but we tie them to the past.
• Additionally, too many teams routinely tell ghost stories about events of the past. They sound like this: “Do you remember how bad that leader was…” And “One of the worst decisions we ever made was…” And “We never seem to have the time to do things right the first time, but we always have the time to do things twice…” Unwittingly, by retelling (and retelling, and retelling) the same scary stories people ensure that past mistakes continue to cost them countless more dollars far into the future.

Understanding the horrific moments in our past is not a mistake, but allowing leadership ghosts to linger, is costly. Conduct a ghost-busting exercise today by asking these questions:

1. What are the most important lessons we can gain from this experience?
2. How can we further leverage this moment as a resource?
3. If we continue to re-tell this story, how would it hurt progress?
4. Why is it important that we put this experience behind us?

The haunted house is closed. It’s time to move forward.

The Most Important Contribution You Can Make to Your Team

Vannoy and Ross

How can you best contribute to your team’s success? The answer may surprise you.

Our last leadership post received an abundance of attention – and created some confusion. “Shame on you for putting forth an example that voting against ourselves (with the implication we’re voting for others) guarantees a loss,” shared one reader. We love this reader’s passion to do whatever it takes to ensure her team wins!

So let’s clarify: “Voting for yourself” in this context does not mean voting against someone else. It is not designed to imply that you must win…so someone else can lose. And unquestionably, as we review the metaphor imbedded in the last post, we can see how such assumptions can be made. So yes, shame on us for a poor metaphor.

Let’s kick out the metaphor – and leverage the idea.

It’s shocking – staggering, really – how many people want, wish and hope their team will perform better, yet they severely limit their own contributions to others and the team. How does this happen? Ask yourself,

• Am I my own worst critic? Does my self-criticism build my confidence – or destroy it?On a regular basis, am I showing up “off a roll” just hoping to slog through another day – or am I doing my best…so I can be my best…and give my best to others?
• Am I retelling old stories about who’s a jerk and what’s making my life difficult, thus sabotaging any chances of a productive mindset – or am I using every day to create a new script, a new, more productive story?

How can you give anything to someone else if you can’t hold it yourself? Those who lack the awareness demonstrated in the questions above move through their day “voting against themselves.” (Rats! There we go again with the metaphor!) As a result, these people have little to give others and their organization.

How can you best contribute to your team’s success? Take regular steps to be the best you. That’s what your teammates are asking for.